I do a lot of thinking. Too much, sometimes. Over the past year or so, many things have proven to be true that I would have previously laughed at the suggestion of, and did. I laughed at some who claimed the govt could spy on us through the tv, but that turned out to be true. I scorned the idea that the govt of my beloved country, among others, was being influenced or controlled from behind the scenes by elitists with nefarious purposes, but that seems more evident by the day. I certainly wouldn’t have imagined the mass abandonment of reason and rationality which seems to be taking place in our society. As a result, I’ve taken a second look at some of the other seemingly crazy claims and theories that are going around, and there are many. It seems increasingly difficult to be sure of what I think I know, even information I thought I had thoroughly vetted and established in my own mind.
In spite of my lifetime of learning, and my encounters with God and the things He has taught me, I still sometimes find my mind struggling with questions like, does the Bible mean what I think it means? Why is the Vatican promoting a world govt, and looking for alien life, and designing and referring to a religion that includes them, even saying that Jesus Himself might be an alien? There’s so many weird ideas out there, and that’s besides terrorists and crazy dictators with nukes, and let’s not even talk about the weather or a volcano in Yellowstone! Then of course there’s unemployment and other personal difficulties.
How do I cope? Knowledge buffers me for a while, but it can only withstand so long against the invading armies of “yeah, but…”, especially knowing that knowledge is so easily manipulated by people, or even my own mind if I’m not careful, and our senses can be so easily deceived by the ways technology can fake reality, and when I’ve come to the limits of my intellectual defenses, I feel like I’m flailing in the winds of confusion and uncertainty, which leads to fear and apprehension.
I’m ashamed that my natural tendency in these times is to cry out to God for assurance and comfort, and wonder why He doesn’t seem to answer, while I put off and patronize the still small voice that urges me to pick up my Bible and read. Instead, I entertain thoughts like, What’s that going to solve?; I know what it says, why read it again?; or I’ve got too much to do. But I eventually always do, and in the foolish pages of an old book who’s debunking and eradication has been attempted by kings, philosophers, scholars, armies, nations, and competing ideologies of all sorts for centuries, and continues today, I never fail to find God.
It has never mattered which version I’m reading. When I can’t seem to find God, or hear Him, I find Him when I look in the Book. “Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you.” How many times must I learn this? I go to His Word, and He comes to me, and speaks to me, and makes Himself known to me in amazing and wonderful ways. He gives me comfort and assurance, and peace that truly is beyond knowledge or understanding. I don’t need all the answers, just to feel His presence, and hear His kind, gentle Voice, and know that He, at least, is real and true and completely trustworthy, and that ALL things are in His powerful hand, whether aliens, or angels, or elitists, or shadow governments, or mad dictators, or deluded masses, or even the weather and volcanoes.
They’re all His, and so am I.
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,neither the present nor the future, nor any powers,neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38