This was first published as a guest post on The recovering legalist, and I wanted to share it here also.
Source: My Testimony (by David Fuller)
I do a lot of thinking. Too much, sometimes. Over the past year or so, many things have proven to be true that I would have previously laughed at the suggestion of, and did. I laughed at some who claimed the govt could spy on us through the tv, but that turned out to be true. I scorned the idea that the govt of my beloved country, among others, was being influenced or controlled from behind the scenes by elitists with nefarious purposes, but that seems more evident by the day. I certainly wouldn’t have imagined the mass abandonment of reason and rationality which seems to be taking place in our society. As a result, I’ve taken a second look at some of the other seemingly crazy claims and theories that are going around, and there are many. It seems increasingly difficult to be sure of what I think I know, even information I thought I had thoroughly vetted and established in my own mind.
In spite of my lifetime of learning, and my encounters with God and the things He has taught me, I still sometimes find my mind struggling with questions like, does the Bible mean what I think it means? Why is the Vatican promoting a world govt, and looking for alien life, and designing and referring to a religion that includes them, even saying that Jesus Himself might be an alien? There’s so many weird ideas out there, and that’s besides terrorists and crazy dictators with nukes, and let’s not even talk about the weather or a volcano in Yellowstone! Then of course there’s unemployment and other personal difficulties.
How do I cope? Knowledge buffers me for a while, but it can only withstand so long against the invading armies of “yeah, but…”, especially knowing that knowledge is so easily manipulated by people, or even my own mind if I’m not careful, and our senses can be so easily deceived by the ways technology can fake reality, and when I’ve come to the limits of my intellectual defenses, I feel like I’m flailing in the winds of confusion and uncertainty, which leads to fear and apprehension.
I’m ashamed that my natural tendency in these times is to cry out to God for assurance and comfort, and wonder why He doesn’t seem to answer, while I put off and patronize the still small voice that urges me to pick up my Bible and read. Instead, I entertain thoughts like, What’s that going to solve?; I know what it says, why read it again?; or I’ve got too much to do. But I eventually always do, and in the foolish pages of an old book who’s debunking and eradication has been attempted by kings, philosophers, scholars, armies, nations, and competing ideologies of all sorts for centuries, and continues today, I never fail to find God.
It has never mattered which version I’m reading. When I can’t seem to find God, or hear Him, I find Him when I look in the Book. “Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you.” How many times must I learn this? I go to His Word, and He comes to me, and speaks to me, and makes Himself known to me in amazing and wonderful ways. He gives me comfort and assurance, and peace that truly is beyond knowledge or understanding. I don’t need all the answers, just to feel His presence, and hear His kind, gentle Voice, and know that He, at least, is real and true and completely trustworthy, and that ALL things are in His powerful hand, whether aliens, or angels, or elitists, or shadow governments, or mad dictators, or deluded masses, or even the weather and volcanoes.
They’re all His, and so am I.
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,neither the present nor the future, nor any powers,neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38
I like certainty, security, stability. I want to know what’s coming, so I can be prepared. I want to understand what’s happening, so I don’t feel confused, and I like knowing what’s real and what’s not. Sometimes I get the luxury of those things, or at least it seems that way for a while. However, now is not one of those times.
I’m looking for work, and at almost 47, I’ve become a relic, because I remember paper job applications. Everything’s online now, and though I consider myself computer savvy, the internet seems to get increasingly convoluted, and there’s no personal interaction. You just send out a signal, and hope you get one back. I’m feeling a little lost and antiquated. My wife and I are stressed, and it’s getting down to the wire.
But will any of that matter? My birthday is August 21, and the whole world seems to be waiting for it. We know for sure there’ll be a solar eclipse, followed by some interesting constellations. Youtubers are going nuts. There’s talk of the Rapture, cosmic rays of higher consciousness, emerald gate portals, and even timeline splits. Some are forecasting the demise of America and the reemergence of the Nephilim. One can blow it all off as nonsense, but the world seems to have gone haywire, and there’s a lot of strange things being discovered and invented lately.
Ancient civilizations that seem to have harnessed energy sources we’re not currently aware of, with possibly other-than-human assistance or direction. They’re perfecting the ability to successfully customize DNA, they can now 3D print human flesh, and they’ve programmed AI bots that invented their own language to communicate with each other. Again, they are customizing DNA, printing flesh, and programming consciousness. And they’re trying to combine species. Oh come on, you know they are. And it sounds alarmingly similar to how some ancient texts say the pre-flood world became corrupted beyond repair, and had to be destroyed. Jesus said it would be like the days of Noah when He returned.
But again, nothing is certain. And while my heart declares with no doubt, “I know whom I have believed”, my fickle, wandering mind sometimes struggles to account for the hard to explain.
A few months ago I was struggling to assimilate new, strange information amidst the voices of intellectual scoffers echoing in my head, and I did what I always end up doing – I ran to my Rock, my Anchor, and my Shield, and into my intellectual chaos came a melody, the hymn, Tis So Sweet To Trust In Jesus. With my bass and computer I laid down 3 spontaneous tracks, then combined them with no editing. The result was a musical representation of that sweet melody running through my personal chaos, my own dreamy instrumental of that beautiful hymn, which I can listen to whenever my mind wants to run amuck. His gift to me, to feed my faith, all the more so because it came from Him. I also posted the hymn lyrics and backstory, but this blog was still an experiment and I wasn’t sure how to share my music with it.
So now that I know how, and since I find myself in a similar place, I’ve decided to reprise (rather than repost) my earlier post, and share my little bass instrumental, maybe someone else will find it uplifting as well. Feel free to share it if you want.
Jesus made time for people. All kinds of people. He came to serve, not to be served, and He made no distinction between people of high or low class, between the religious and the sinner, between the socially acceptable and the shunned; He served all alike.
Although Jesus reserved some of his harshest criticism for the hypocrisy of the Pharisees, He did not hate them. He made time for Nicodemus, the fearful Pharisee who came to Him under cover of night to find answers to his troubling questions. He made time to answer the questions of the Pharisees who travelled with Him and His disciples. And when a Pharisee named Simon invited Him to dinner at his house, Jesus accepted his invitation as readily as Matthew’s.
While at Simon’s home, a woman with a local reputation for being sinful came in weeping and proceeded to wash His feet with her tears, dry them with her hair, and annoint them with expensive perfume. This situation Jesus readily accepted also.
Simon however, was appalled. It’s a pretty safe bet that this woman had never been in Simon’s home before, and maybe never would have if Jesus hadn’t been there. To have associations with this notorious sinner would have meant scandal for Simon. He might have been seen as one of those who “…lead captive silly women, laden with sins” (2 Timothy 3:6). Her steps go down to death and Sheol; he wanted nothing to do with her.
It’s my guess that prior to this, she didn’t have much use for the Pharisees, either. I doubt she had any particular longing to be in Simon’s house. But in the presence of Jesus, sinners and Pharisees often find themselves under the same roof.
Jesus lived and moved in two mutually exclusive worlds. Neither one had much tolerance for the other. It was all the same to Him whether He ate with tax collectors and harlots one night, or Pharisees and harlots the next. They were all people whom His Father loved. Beyond that, they were people He loved. Neither the sinner’s disdain nor the Pharisees’s smug self-righteousness was a part of His thinking.
Where Jesus is, anything can happen. Worlds collide, and human beings are reminded that they’re just human beings – nothing more and nothing less. Sinners and Pharisees find themselves under the same roof, faced with the same Saviour, and the realization that we’re ALL worth saving.
©2017 David Fuller
Beyond my fears
Beyond the shedding
Of my tears
The hope of glory
In my heart
A candle light
A flame of Love
Melts my heart
The strongest faith
The slightest doubt
He’s holding out
Can I ever
Son of Love
The sweetest peace
© 2017 David R. Fuller
I copied this directly from an email I received from Equisync, minus the part where they try to sell their binaural beats generator for meditation. Truth is truth, though. Of course I added the scripture at the bottom.
“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”-Mahatma Gandhi
Would you like to live a long, happy, and fulfilled life? Perhaps the most important thing you can do is forgive the unforgivable.
While the person who wronged you may not deserve to be forgiven for the heartache and grief they caused you, your mind, body, and soul deserve to be free of hatred, anger, pain, and hurt.
Likewise, if it was you who caused the pain, self-forgiveness is just as important.
Before we tell you the secret to letting go of the past, it is important to understand some basics:
What is forgiveness?
Forgiveness is a release & letting go of a past hurt or resentment. A deliberate conscious act that comes completely from within, forgiveness does not require justice or an apology, while releasing all energetic debt between the people involved.
How can forgiveness positively impact my life?
• Often the first step toward healing.
• Helps you accept the shadow side of humanity: shines light on the dark.
• Releases you from the past and allows you to be present in the here and now.
• It can mend old friendships.
• Holding on to grudges causes stress, leading to a myriad of emotional/physical problems.
• Is of paramount importance in almost all spiritual traditions, particularly Christianity.
• Feel more freedom, as you are no longer holding on to the negative feelings toward yourself and others.
• It can open you up to more love and light.
• When you accept the flaws within others, you accept the flaws within yourself.
• Feel lighter from the cathartic release of emotional burden.
• Dramatically improve your physical, emotional, and spiritual health.
Then Peter came and said to him, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Until seven times?”
Jesus said to him, “I don’t tell you until seven times, but, until seventy times seven.
Matthew 18:21, 22
May the Lord answer you when you are in distress;
may the name of the God of Jacob protect you.
May he send you help from the sanctuary
and grant you support from Zion.
May he remember all your sacrifices
and accept your burnt offerings.
May he give you the desire of your heart
and make all your plans succeed.
May we shout for joy over your victory
and lift up our banners in the name of our God.
May the Lord grant all your requests.
Psalm 20: 1-5
New International Version (NIV)
Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.